Real Steel(2011)- Movie Review

Not unlike most parents, I enjoy seeing my kids get excited.  The excitement wasn’t really there when I fired up XBMC and told them we were going to watch Real Steel.  What I got was, “XBMC random recommends Barbie and the Three Musketeers, lets watch that instead.”  Not to be dissuaded, I scrolled past all the Barbie movies and selected Real Steal. 

I am not sure at what point the movie captured the attention of my girls, but it happened fairly early on.  I think it might have been when Charlie refuses to let the girls take a picture of his robot.  From there the girls were watching, and laughing at the appropriate times, but once Atom enters the movie, they were completely sold. 

I don’t know if you have ever been watching a movie with kids so into it that they are jumping around and screaming while watching it.  Actually cheering for the movie.  If you haven’t, it is a pretty amazing thing.  How can you tell them to settle down when they are obviously having so much fun.  One of them looked at me and said, “I bet you are glad that you didn’t take us to the theater for this movie.” 

I think this will be my entire review.  I could compare it to Rocky or tell you about the acting, but I think the simple enthusiasm that it brought out in my kids is review enough.  Sure it is a movie about robot boxing, but it is a movie about robot boxing that two girls aged 7 and 11 fell in love with.  I liked it too.  I think growing up I would have liked it and reacted in much the same way that they did.  For a minute, while watching this movie I felt like a 10 year old again, and for that alone, this movie gets 4 stars.  Highly recommended.

 

Ninja Assassin Movie Review

Image via Wikipedia

Originally posted at PracticalBlackBelt.com

I was excited when I heard about Ninja Assassin. I watched the preview and thought that it was going to be a modern special effects extravaganza with an old school 80’s ninja movie feel. It came out and the reviews were absolutely horrible. At first I thought they must not understand what the film was trying to do, but then it was reviewed by someone that wanted it to be exactly what I did. They said the movie failed. So, I put off watching it.

Avengers- Movie Review

If you are the one person in North America that did not see The Avengers this weekend, you are missing out.  It was a nonstop thrill ride with a surprising amount of humor.  The movie only slows down long enough for the viewer to catch their breath and then it picks right back up again. 

 

Avengers shows us that despite what the Dark Knight trilogy may have thought it taught us, a comic book movie does not need to be dark and 100 percent serious to be truly Awesome.  This movie showed us that we can have fun at the movies again. 

 

I did not see it in 3d so cannot comment on that, but the rest of the effects in the movie were excellent.  If you show up for a pre noon showing at AMC you can get tickets for any movie for $6, and that is what I did.  The whole family enjoyed the movie for $24.  Added bonus, my 7yo was wearing her Wonder Woman and Batman buttons that she had received on Free Comic Book Day and the lady behind the counter called her over and gave her a bag of Avengers buttons.  The movie was so good and spotlighted the stars so well, that my girls didn’t even argue about who got which pin, they were happy with any of them. 

 

It is fun for the whole family.  To be honest, had my kids not made a big deal about this movie, I might not have seen this one in theaters.  Well with all the buzz that is coming out this week, I may have.  But, I went to see this movie because my kids, especially my 7yo wanted to see it.  My wife just tagged along with no interest at all.  We all loved it.  My kids have not stopped talking about it since.  They want more.  They want to see the movie again. 

 

Go see this movie.  Be sure to stay for the stinger.  It is so worth it. 

 

 

Hanna-2011

What is a Hanna movie review doing on a science fiction blog, you might ask.  The rude answer would be that I can put up a review of whatever I want, but the better answer is that there is a science fiction element to this movie.  I won’t give away what that is, but I am sure most people can figure it out pretty early in the movie. 

The plot-  Think Bourne Identity but with a 14 year old girl.  While the concept wasn’t completely original, I am looking at you Cassandra Cain: Batgirl, it was a deviation from your normal Bourne thriller.  It is more of a surface type movie as if you stop and think about any one part too much it will start to break down.  For example, the father hides the truth from her.  While it creates tension between the characters and sets Hanna up for the hero’s journey, it just doesn’t make sense for him to do that.  His goal for her would better be achieved if Hanna knew the whole truth.  But the movie moves along at a fast enough pace that you don’t really think about things like that while you are watching it. 

The Acting-  Saorise and the incredible Hulk due a pretty good job in this one.  The little British girl made me want to jump in the screen and throttle her, so I guess she was playing her part dead on.  The actors were all pretty good and well directed. 

The Action-  Some of the best fight choreography I have seen in a movie.  They tried to make the fight scenes as realistic as possible it seems and they succeeded for the most part. 

Overall it was a fun movie.  I watched with the wife and oldest daughter.  It is rated PG-13 for violence and it seemed fine for my oldest.  I would say 10+.  Give this a watch if you enjoyed Bourne, Soldier, or Cassandra Cain Batgirl.  My 10 year old gets bonus points for calling the last line of the movie.  I saw it coming too, but she called it out loud. 

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (2012)

I must preface this review with the statement that I have read and enjoyed the book that Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter  was based on.  My Review Here, Steve's review here.

Disappointed.  That is how I feel; disappointed.  I mean.  I told everyone how great the book was and how factual it was.  I think I have said that the book is 90% biography and 10% vampires.  I stick by that for the book. A lot of poeple I said this to, will not read the book, but they will watch the movie.  What will they think of me after that. 

The acting was good.  I saw it mentioned that the guy playine Lincoln looked a lot like Liam Neeson, my wife mentioned it as well.  Alan Tudyk was Stephen Douglas which was a pleasant surprise. 

The plot was similar to that of the book except that it wasn't any good.  They turned this into an action movie.  Actually it was more of a superhero movie with Lincoln having super human strength and agility.  According to the movie, Lincoln only had one child who was murdered by vampires.  In reality, Lincoln had 4 sons, two of which died before Lincoln himself (vampires?).  The other two sons outlived Lincoln, but only one made it to adulthood (vampires?).  The book gets this right. 

The beauty of the book is that it did not try and shoe horn vampires into the story.  It took tragic events in Lincolns life and attributed them to vampires.  It takes those empty periods when Lincoln wasn't making history and attributed those times to vampires.  The movie fails in this respect.  Maybe there wasn't enough time to tell the Lincoln story and the vampire story, but only telling half makes the movie lose its charm. 

Overall- It is an action movie.  It is not as good as the book.  I would say 10 and up due to action violence. 

Green Lanter-Spoiler Free Movie Review

My wife and children took me to see Green Lantern this weekend for Father's Day.  It was just what I wanted.  They knew this because I told them I wanted to see it Sunday afternoon.  I did give hints but they were too subtle.  I would say things like, "it is really neat that Green Lantern is coming out on Father's day weekend, and do stuff like put on my Green Lantern T-shirt on Sunday.  Anyway, on to the review. 

Characters-  I had questions about the casting going in to this.  I felt that Ryan Reynolds would have been better suited to a Kyle Raynor GL than a Hal Jordan.  He stepped up and it was pretty good.  You got to see Hal grow into the ring somewhat.  Hector Hammond was spot on, Sinestro had the look but the voice was distracting.  It was just way different than the superfriends voice that still gets used in my head when I read a GL comic.  Blake Lively is still the big question mark.  She wasn't bad, but I wasn't reading CEO and pilot.  One of my favorite character parts was watching Hal as he learns to fly with the ring.  The character is a pilot and flight without a plane should truly delight a pilot and Reynolds was able to capture that. 

Special Effects-  In the credits there were at least six special effects studios involved.  The effects were pretty consistant and the only times they were a distraction was during two scenes with GL either flying or taking off.  Other than that, the movie was gorgeous.  I watched it in 2D, so I can't comment on 3D.

Plot-  This is really where the movie didn't quite measure up.  It was like they wanted to tell too much story.  Earlier I mentioned that Hal grows into the ring with the somewhat identifier.  I hate to say it but a montage of heroics may have been in order.  My biggest problem was with the pacing.  Every writing class I have ever heard of tells their students to show and not tell.  In movies, this should be much easier because it is a visual format.  Green Lantern tells a lot.  The movie is full of exposition.  GL has a very dense history with lots of little intrigues and twists, especially since John's run on the book.  But you can't just explain all that in the movie, it should be shown or revealed over the course of the series.  My wife didn't get all of that and was pretty confused about the guardians and Sinestro.

I can hear people now.  You think you could right a better screen play.  Why yes I do.  My story would have centered on Hammond as the only villian, not had Abin Sur's back story, probably would have had more training on OA and might have hinted at Paralax for a sequel. 

Overall- It was an entertaining movie.  Having a back ground education in Green Lantern comics helped me with the exposition but irked me when they tweaked things.  I left the theater happy, but left thinking Earth was the only planet with life or problems in sector 2814.  Some parts may be scary for younger children, but the movie was pretty family friendly. 

Kick Ass Movie Review-Spoiler Free

Image via Wikipedia

*originally posted at Practical Black Belt


I read this comic and enjoyed the heck out of it. It was almost a treatise on if superheroes did exist, what would it be like. How would one go about it and what would really happen. So I was pretty excited to see the movie.

Dave, our protagonist, is set to find out what happens when one tries to become a superhero. He wonders why no one has ever dawned the mask and went forth to set fear into the heart of evil doers. The problem that strikes me and that is meant to strike all viewers and readers is that Dave has no superpowers and no martial training. What he does have are two batons in the comic and escrima sticks in the movie.

In his training montage, you find out that Dave has absolutely no idea how to use his weapon of choice and it becomes even clearer when he tries to save the day the first time. It is at this point that the comic and the movie really start to diverge.

The true star of this movie is Hitgirl. Very Cassandra Cainesque, she is a child trained in the art of killing. Her father has trained her in weapons and hand to hand. She is a force to be reckoned with. Whereas Dave has absolutely no training and skill, Hitgirl has an abundance of both. I was mesmerized by the knife work in a knife fight scene. Whoever choreographed it, knew a thing or two.


Other than changing the story so that it was more of a storybook ending the only problems I had with the movie were costuming and the casting of one character. Big Daddy and Redmist are not costumed well. Big Daddy is made to look like Batman and Redmist looks like an emo Robin. These characters where not dressed this way in the comic and I am not sure why the decision would have been made to change the costumes for the movie. The kid that played Redmist wasn’t right for the part. Everyone else was spot on, but he just wasn’t the Redmist from the comics. The car was still cool though.

Overall it was a decent movie with some great action sequences. The changes to the story did not make it better. The comic was, kind of, more realistic in its portrayal of life of a superhero. In the comic Dave comes home beat up several times. The movie goes a little bit over the top with the action. While fun to watch and look at, it doesn’t come across as what would really happen. Of course the love story is story book and not at all as realistic as the one in the comic.

The comic was at about 4.5
The movie come in at 3.5

Not recommended for children due to language, graphic violence, and sexual situations. People looking for hardcore martial arts should look elsewhere. Fans of action movies should get their fix with this one.

Legend of the Guardians- A 9yr Old's Review

Image by CityTalk via Flickr

This weekend I took the family to see Legend of the Guardians in 3D.  My nine year old was really hyped about this movie as she has read the series past the point where the movie ends.  She is really familiar with the characters and she really likes the series.
So, I am going to interview her for the review. 
Q:  What did you think of the movie?
A:  They changed everything.  It was really short. 
Q:  Did the movie stay true to the characters in the book?
A:  True but they left a lot of characters out.  It skipped like 5 books in the series.  The characters just didn’t go to St. Aggies or to Ga’Hoole so quickly. 
Q:  If you had never read the books would the movie be entertaining?
A:  Not really, It didn’t make sense.  It just kind of skipped through the story.  My younger daughter piped in that she really liked it. 
Q:  What did you think of the animation and 3D?
A:  It was nice but not a lot of it came out at you.  It wasn’t quite as good as Avatar (as in the blue people).  They dd a pretty good job of animating the owls. 
Q:  Is this movie for children or adults?
A:  No one. Only for people who have read the books so they can mock it. 
My 6yo wanted to give her opinion: “Some of it popped out to my face. I had a good time.  It was good, My favorite character was Soren.  It was beautiful.”
For my part, I was entertained.  The 3D was pretty good, but didn’t blow me away.  You might be able to get away with 2D on this one.  But, there was awesome shots in there and some pretty breathtaking landscapes too.  My 9yo can’t stop talking about how different the movie was from the books.  I think she understands how I feel about X3 and the wolverine movie now. 

Movie Review Double Feature

First up in this double feature will be the marvelous Milla Jovovich in The newest entry in the Resident Evil universe; Retribution.  This series has always been a guilty pleasure for me, both the video games and the movies.  I have to say that this was the best entry into the franchise since the second movie.  The movie itself is beautiful and the plot felt like a video game.  For those that don't know, the Resident Evil games usually have an overall objective with a lot of mini objectives as you go on your way.  Escaping the simulation center is the main objective with mini missions of fight through NYC, find the child (boss battle against jill), find the rescue team, car chase (boss battle with the licker), rescue the child (second boss battle against licker), and the escape (final boss battle against Jill and Michelle Rodriguez). 

The important thing about this movie is that it is fun and this one was a lot of fun. 

Second on the list but not in the standings is Dredd, the newest cinamatic take on the iconic 2000 AD comic.  Staring Karl Urban as Dredd himself this movie more than makes up for the Stallone and Rob Schneider mess that made a mockery of the hero so many years ago.  This movie felt more than a little like Raid: Redemption.  This one comes highly suggested.  Karl Urban projects the quiet confidence and rage that is Dredd.  Lena Headey is also in this movie as the big bad and she rocks it.  Olivia Thirlby plays a rookie and if she ever reads this she needs to know that she is much better looking with the blonde hair she wore in the film.

Overall this movie was a whole lot of fun and didn't get the acclaim that it deserved in theaters.  I hope it was successful enough that it gets some sequels.  This movie has been Judged!

300 review w/SPOILERS (not by me)

I haven't seen the flick yet, but I had to drop this review I found. It is a negative review and probably quite contrary to the other participants here. I'll drop my actual thoughts after I have seen it.

I know at least one person who will thoroughly disagree with this review. heh heh heh.

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A Movie Only a Spartan Could Love
The battle epic 300.
By Dana Stevens

If 300, the new battle epic based on the graphic novel by Frank Miller and Lynn Varley, had been made in Germany in the mid-1930s, it would be studied today alongside The Eternal Jew as a textbook example of how race-baiting fantasy and nationalist myth can serve as an incitement to total war. Since it's a product of the post-ideological, post-Xbox 21st century, 300 will instead be talked about as a technical achievement, the next blip on the increasingly blurry line between movies and video games.

Directed by Zack Snyder, whose first feature film was the 2004 makeover of the horror classic Dawn of the Dead, 300 digitally re-creates the Battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C., where, according to classical history and legend, the Spartan king Leonidas led a force of only 300 men against a Persian enemy numbering in the hundreds of thousands. The comic fanboys who make up 300's primary audience demographic aren't likely to get hung up on the movie's historical content, much less any parallels with present-day politics. But what's maddening about 300 (besides the paralyzing monotony of watching chiseled white guys make shish kebabs from swarthy Persians for 116 indistinguishable minutes) is that no one involved—not Miller, not Snyder, not one of the army of screenwriters, art directors, and tech wizards who mounted this empty, gorgeous spectacle—seems to have noticed that we're in the middle of an actual war. With actual Persians (or at least denizens of that vast swath of land once occupied by the Persian empire).

In interviews, Snyder insists that he "really just wanted to make a movie that is a ride"—a perfectly fine ambition for any filmmaker, especially one inspired by the comics. And visually, 300 is thrilling, color-processed to a burnished, monochromatic copper, and packed with painterly, if static, tableaux vivants. But to cast 300 as a purely apolitical romp of an action film smacks of either disingenuousness or complete obliviousness. One of the few war movies I've seen in the past two decades that doesn't include at least some nod in the direction of antiwar sentiment, 300 is a mythic ode to righteous bellicosity. In at least one way, the film is true to the ethos of ancient Greece: It conflates moral excellence and physical beauty (which, in this movie, means being young, white, male, and fresh from the gyms of Brentwood).

Here are just a few of the categories that are not-so-vaguely conflated with the "bad" (i.e., Persian) side in the movie: black people. Brown people. Disfigured people. Gay men (not gay in the buff, homoerotic Spartan fashion, but in the effeminate Persian style). Lesbians. Disfigured lesbians. Ten-foot-tall giants with filed teeth and lobster claws. Elephants and rhinos (filthy creatures both). The Persian commander, the god-king Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro) is a towering, bald club fag with facial piercings, kohl-rimmed eyes, and a disturbing predilection for making people kneel before him.

Meanwhile, the Spartans, clad in naught but leather man-briefs, fight under the stern command of Leonidas (Gerard Butler), whose warrior ethic was forged during a childhood spent fighting wolves in the snow. Leonidas likes to rally the troops with bellowed speeches about "freedom," "honor," and "glory," promising that they will be remembered for having created "a world free from mysticism and tyranny." (The men's usual response, a fist-pumping "A-whoo! A-whoo!" sounds strangely fratty.) But Leonidas is not above playing the tyrant himself. When a messenger from Xerxes arrives bearing news Leonidas doesn't like, he hurls the man, against all protocol, down a convenient bottomless well in the center of town. "This is blasphemy! This is madness!" says the messenger, pleading for his life. "This is Sparta," Leonidas replies. So, if Spartan law is defined by "whatever Leonidas wants," what are the 300 fighting for, anyway? And why does that sound depressingly familiar?

Another of the Spartans' less-than-glorious customs is the practice of eugenics, hurling any less-than-perfect infant off a cliff onto a huge pile of baby skeletons. Unfortunately for the 300 at Thermopylae, this system of racial cleansing isn't foolproof: One deformed hunchback, Ephialtes (Andrew Tiernan), manages to make it to adulthood and begs Leonidas for a chance to serve Sparta in the 300. Sure enough, when he's turned down, the hunchback confirms his moral weakness by accepting Xerxes' offer to join ranks with the Persians.

Meanwhile, back home in Sparta, Leonida's wife, Gorgo (Lena Headey), engages in some plot-padding political intrigue with the evil Theron (The Wire's Dominic West, looking particularly risible in classical drapery). Theron wants to persuade the Spartan council not to send reinforcements to the desperately outnumbered 300 (what is he, a Democrat?). The noble and sexy Gorgo finally gives herself to Theron in exchange for a chance to persuade the council. "This will not be over quickly," the villain warns as he pins her against a temple pillar. "You will not enjoy this." It might have been Zack Snyder himself whispering in my ear, and he would have been right.

In a classic example of the epic understatement known as litotes, Variety's reviewer observes that the picture's vision of the West as a heroic contingent of sculpted badasses and the East as a cauldron perversion and iniquity "might be greeted with muted enthusiasm in the Middle East." Replace the words "muted enthusiasm" with "a roadside bomb," and you've got yourself a tagline for the Baghdad premiere.

Dana Stevens is Slate's movie critic. You can write her at movies@thehighsign.net.

Super 8-movie review

So this movie had huge hype over the summer.  I was afraid to watch it because of that.  But I dutifully tuned in so that I may inform the Scifi Media viewing community. 

Plot-  Think district 9 but with only one really cool alien.  It is also set in the 80’s and the feel of the movie is totally Goonies.  This is good, great in fact.  Goonies might be one of the greatest movies with a predominantly adolescent cast.  The fact that this movie hit that note is excellent.  Not only did it remind me of Goonies, but it also reminded me of growing up and the way kids were. 

Characters-  Abrams made these kids shine.  In between lens flares you see these kids being kids.  It doesn’t seem like acting.  Elle Fanning showed her chops early by doing the play within a play at the beginning and totally selling it.  While the plot has been somewhat done before the acting in this movie teamed with scripting and directing makes you connect to these kids.  It made me think of growing up and my friends from that time. 

SFX-  Awesome, no draw back here.  They are well integrated and do not stick out like a sore thumb, well except for the constant lens flares. 

Family fun-  It is violent and a little scary at times, but I watched it with my oldest and she enjoyed it quite a bit.  There was a lot of language in it, but there is some language in Goonies as well, though not nearly as much.

Overall-It was a great movie, maybe the best of the summer.  I would say that 12 and up are good ages for this movie or around the ages of the kids in the movie.  Highly recommended. 

The Sorcerer's Apprentice-Spoiler Free Movie Review

Went to see this with the girls and a family from church.  Wasn't really looking forward to seeing it or excited about it in any way and only knew that it was based on the scene from Fantasia. 

Nick Cage plays Nick Cage in this movie and he is a sorcerer of the Merlinian Order,  he is looking for evil Morganian sorcerers and a successor to Merlin that can end Morgan once and for all. 

I swear the roommat and the girlfriend, with a combined total of 10 minutes of screen time are the best actors in the movie.  Nick Cage gets to play himself so he isn't that bad, but you never forget that you are watching Nick Cage.  The kid that got to be the apprentice was aweful though.  a twenty year old with a cracking, screech (saved by the bell) voice and look. 

The movie had some funny parts and set up the back story pretty well, but the plot was fairly predictable.  There were some opportunities to do some things differently and they didn't take them.  They could have given the movie a lot more heart.  It wasn't bad, but it wasn't particularly good.  It was a kids movie. 

Yeah, it was a kids movie.  What else did you expect from Disney.  Well, I remember some movies called Pirates of the Caribean that were fun for the whole family, or at least the first one was.  But disney decided this one would be for kids.  If you have kids between the ages of 7 and 14, they should really like it.  Everyone else will be entertained but the movie isn't going to blow them away. 

The Human Centipede(2009)-Movie Review

Have you ever heard so many people say that a movie is disgusting and a waste of film that you had to check it out for yourself.  That is pretty much what happened with the Human Centipede and me.

Even some horror bloggers didn't care for this one.  It falls into the torture porn genre, I guess.  I personally see it as a mad scientist type movie as the good Dr's purpose was not to torture but to experiment.

If you haven't heard about this movie, the plot is basically that a mad scientist want to join three people mouth to anus to form a human centipede.  That is pretty much the entire movie.  I guess the torture porn label is kind of apt as the soundtrack is overwhelmed by whimpering, screaming, and sobbing for the most part.

The acting was okay.  It was a low budget film, but all most of the actors had to do was scream and cry.  Not a lot of depth needed.  Dieter was sufficiently creepy.  The girls may get some more scream time in other movies as they are attractive and proved that they are capable.

Overall, it wasn't a great movie, but it wasn't as bad as what everyone led me to believe.  I wouldn't say I enjoyed the movie, but I didn't not enjoy it either.  It was suspenseful and creepy which is what I wanted it to be.  I don't know if saw fans will like it as their is no elaborate contraptions or schemes.  Not sure about Hostel fans either as it isn't really a torture flick.  I would say the best match would be those that like weird Japanese movies.

The second movie is out and I am pretty sure that they upped the weird as it has been banned in the UK.   

Sucker Punch Spoiler Free Review

I have seen Sucker Punch and I liked it.  I would say think Inception meets Beautiful Mind.  You will read, probably have read some bad reviews of this movie.  I don't think that all of them are quite fair.  They say that there is no story, but I think there is.  The story just may be more complicated than they expect.

Story-  Babydoll's step-dad is a gold digger.  Her mother dies and leaves everything to her daughters.  This of course leads the step father to get mad and to take actions that will end up with Babydoll in an insane asylum.  Once in the asylum, Babydoll imagines herself in a brothel.  When music is played in the brothel, Babydoll imagines herself in a series of fantasy worlds armed with a handgun with stylish cell phone charms and a katana.    An escape plan is hatched and it in the fantasy world that the items needed for escape are gathered.  The one weakness is that once we enter the world of the brothel, the viewer is forced to imagine the corresponding sequences that are happening in the real world of the asylum.  This is where the negative reviews come from.

Characters-  You meet virtually all of the girls in the fantasy worlds.  Because of this they are all playing roles.  You get snippets of their asylum personalities and stories, but what you mainly get is Babydoll's image of them.  As such, they are not developed much.

Martial Arts-  Although this movie is full of sword play and fighting it is all fantasy based.  Some of the moves may be real, but the are so stylized and over the top that any authenticity is lost.  The fight scenes are definitely something to see though.  Mind blowing, which leads to our next category.

Visuals-  Lets be honest, this is the real reason to go see this movie.  The action is over the top.  The fantasy world is beautifully rendered and flawless.  There are clockwork-zombie-nazis, orcs, dragons, stone samurai, and robots and they all look real and move the way you would expect.  Sometimes the effects can pull you out of the movie as they just don't blend well, but Sucker Punches graphics pull you in completely.

Overall-  This is a movie about empowerment.  That is what the fantasy worlds are all about.  The movie has a message and if you think about what is happening in the real world to not only inspire the brothel world, but also to regress baby into a deeper fantasy world, the movie is much more potent.  Although the theater was full of teen boys, the only thing they are going to get out of it is the pretty. This movie was made for a more thoughtful audience, but it looks like they don't get it.  The movie was designed with PG-13 in mind, but could have been a lot better had they gone for R.

I will recommend this one for 16 plus age group.  You know from watching the previews if you want to see it or not.  While there is a story and it is deeper than most give it credit for, if you watched the trailer and it didn't appeal to you, the story isn't going to salvage anything.  I can only think of one thing that the movie was missing; motorcycles!  Come on Zach Snyder. 

*Originally posted at Practical Black Belt.

Street Fighter:The Legend of Chun-Li spoiler free movie review

Against the Judgment of many before me, I decided to give this one a watch.  I got it from the library so the only thing it cost me was 2 hrs of time, so about $60.  Well I didn't watch it at work so that two hours is worth more.  I digress.

The movie starts out real slow and it spells everything out to you.  Apparently, there is a secret good guy organization and all the members keep the organization secret by tattooing the insignia on their hand.  Any time the movie starts to speed up and flow, the director slows it back down again.

This movie also has that one kid from American Pie in it.  No not that guy the other one.  No the other, other one.  It seems like he is trying to channel Jason Lee from my name is Earl as an Interpol agent.  His acting is horrible in this movie so it actually fit right in. Moon Bloodgood was wasted as hot female cop.  Kruek made her Smallville performances look good.  When the actors tried to act, dialogue got in the way. 

The plot, it had holes.  I watched the deleted scenes and it actually filled in some of the holes.  The characters did dumb things for dumb reasons and didn't act realistically at all.  It took a simple revenge plot and mucked it all up.  The martial arts sucked in this movie.  The fight scenes could have made this movie, but it was all wire work.  They do some crazy stuff in the video game, but everything about every fight was way over the top.  It was overkill and made it uninteresting. 

The director was the worst part.  Sure Kruek is there for looks but she can act better than she was.  Wardrobe was horrible especially Chun-Li's outfit in the club where she lesbian dances.  He obviously cut scenes from the movie that explained other scenes.  For instance Moon Bloodgood's character asks interpol agent Nash for money to buy something to drink while they are on stakeout.  That is the whole scene.  That is it.  She doesn't go buy a soda and miss something.  The place doesn't blow up.  Just her in a car asking for money to buy a soda and then cut to a different scene.  The deleted scenes show him pull out his wallet to get money and reveal a picture of his Daughter whom Bison killed.  They cut the daughter completely out of the film apparently.  But dumb things are happening like that all through the film.

My 9 year old thought it was stupid and didn't make sense.  She wanted to like Kruek and Bloodgood because they are both half Asian like she is.  But in the end, the only reason to see this film is to find out how bad it really is or to help you go to sleep.  Get the 90's Street Fighter instead.  Ming Na is hot. 

 

John Carter-Spoiler Free Movie Review

John Carter of Mars was disappointing.  It was...too Disney.  I understand that some changes would be needed in order to make the movie work, but the end result of the movie is almost unrecognizable from the book it was based on.  Some of the changes I liked and some of them I didn't quite care for.  I thought the Red Martians should be more read or at least more different than humans on Earth.  The Tarks and Woolah were entirely too cute to be considered threatening. 

Ashli, who has not yet read Princess of Mars, thought the movie was great.  Maybe I will get her to do an unbiased review.  As I feel that reading the book less than a year before watching the movie, may have ruined things for me. 

If you can't tell from the above picture I am in love with Lynn Collins.  This may be compounded by the fact that I was already in love with Deja Thoris. 

Cabin in the Woods-Spoiler Free Movie Review

Wow, just wow.  I came into Cabin in the Woods with just the most basic information; the cabin was a construct being controlled.  This isn't a spoiler as it is revealed from the very start.  The rest of the movie was a surprise to me though.  A great surprise at that.  There were three other people in the room and this movie had us all laughing and groaning in sympathetic pain.  It had us hook line and sinker. 

The story was good and a pretty unique take on your general horror movie fare.  It doesn't seem that original at first (group of kids going on a road trip to a cabin) but quickly becomes very intriguing. 

The cast are amazing.  The people in the "lab" are great.  Thor does a pretty good job.  The red head (Kristen Connelly) was scortching hot.  The stoner guy was the perfect comic relief.  There is even a cameo at the end that was excellent.  Slasher films aren't known for their acting but this one is very good. 

Overall, it was a great movie that everyone in the room enjoyed a great deal.  We were doing a double feature and were really worried that the movie that followed it would be a massive let down in comparison.  I say the movie is probably okay for 13+, but only for horror fans as the film can be satirical to the genre and some jokes can be missed.  If you like horror movies, you should get a pretty good kick out of this one.  I give it 5 out of 5 slashes. 

Have you seen it?  What did you think?

Ant-Man spoiler free movie review

Behold, in the year of our lord 2015 a hero will emerge that may at first go unnoticed because of his stature.  Word will spread of his deeds and his renown will grow!


Saw Ant-Man this weekend.  Let me tell you, it was great.  I think I enjoyed it more than age of Ultron.  It just hit the right note.  I am not a huge Ant-Man comics fan.  I did read the Scott Lang origin story and an issue where he gets a job working for Tony Stark.  Classic Ant-Man was never really my thing, though.  I worried about Marvel's ability to put up a hero that would be believable in a battle against super-powered opponents.  I saw the movie because I trust Marvel.  They have not abused that trust to this point. 


This movie should have come out on Father's Day weekend as Fatherhood is a huge theme in this movie.  It covers absent fathers, distant fathers, step fathers, father figures, and redemption.  I think it handles the relationships pretty realistically, even in the context of and separated from realism, comic book universe. 


The action was amazing. They really surprised me with how they handled the fight choreography and the use of Ant-Man's powers.  They managed to make the combatants in the fight completely serious and still infuse humor into the fight scenes.  In the climactic fight scene you don't get the Spider-man, I am not really taking this seriously, banter (that is fine for Spidey, it his thing).  The characters are fighting and it feels like a fight,  hate on one side, and a defensive attitude on the other, lightened up by secondary scenes and plays on setting.  This created the perfect tone. 


Go see this movie, heck, take your dad to see this movie, you both will enjoy it immensely.  If you don't have a dad, take someone else's.  My girls took me, and the movie was all the better for it. 

X-Men: First Class (2011)

So, I watched X-Men:  First Class.  I guess technically, as a movie, removed from the comic, it was a good enough movie.  But, I am unable to separate the years of comic book reading from the movie.  I did have problems with the plot as well so on to the review.

Plot-I have no doubt that there are people that exist that would love to see the world burn.  I don't doubt this.  But to have Sabastian Shaw, a very wealthy womanizer, be the person that wants to see the world burn doesn't make sense.  For whatever reason, he thinks all mutants will survive nuclear annihilation and start a new world. Even if they were able to survive the nuclear blasts and fallout, they would inherit a dead world.  They also has a character named Darwin that has the ability to adapt to conditions around him to survive.  In order to establish Shaw's power we get to see how Darwin can't adapt to everything regardless of the fact that it was established that he could.  He was also the one black guy in the movie.  Yes, the black man dies.

Acting-  I can't fault the movie here.  The acting was pretty good.  Well, I didn't care for the constipated Professor X, but everyone else was pretty good and I would like to see them in a real X-Men movie.

Characterization-  The X-Men are almost 50 years old.  They have a 50, oft times convoluted, history, but they have a history.  The comics have epic story arcs that are critically acclaimed.  I understand that they wanted to do something original and I am not opposed to someone doing that, but why mess with the characters.  I mean, they put characters in the wrong place in time lines.  Alex Summers is the brother of Cyclops.  Having him as a 20 something in the 60s means he is 40 years older than his older brother.  That is just one small example.  They took 50 years of characterization and continuity and crapped all over it.

Some people will say that the first X-Men movie did the same.  To a degree, it did.  But that was a different time and I think folks were just excited to see the X-Men  on the big screen.

Overall, it was an okay movie if you separate it from comics.  As a comics fan, I just felt cheated.  I wanted to take a shower after watching the movie.

The Crazies- Spoiler Free Review

I heard this movie was pretty good, so I tracked down a copy.  I remember something about when it came to the theater, but I am sure it did poorly and no one made a big deal about the DVD release.  It is a remake of a movie that I have not seen from 1973, I believe (too lazy to look, but not so lazy that I won't waste a sentence explaining why I didn't look).  It stars Timothy Olyphant (from other movies starring Timothy Olyphant) and a bunch of people I have never heard of.

Plot- Yeah, you have been here before.  Even if it wasn't a remake, this is the plot to several zombie movies with some subtle changes.  The movie keeps a pretty quick pace and does an excellent job of setting mood and building suspense.  The military is punching bag, which is over done and not fair to people that are in or have been in the military. 

Characters- As the action takes place over the course of about 3 days, you can't expect too much character development, but there wasn't any really.  Characters act in the way that you expect them to act.  The actors all did well in their one dimensional roles, but the deputy puts forth the most memorable performance.

Cinematography- A lot of the movie was too dark.  I was watching at night with the lights out and I couldn't make everything out, this may have been to help establish the mood, but it was distracting.  It is possible that this is just a problem with my equipment so let me know if you experienced anything different. 

Overall-  It was decent way to pass some time.  It will make you jump in a couple places and that usually makes a movie worth it for me.  It is a retread plot that doesn't say anything.  This movie is happy just being a horror movie.  I would keep the kiddies way from this one as it is pretty gory and intense at places.  There is also some language.  If you like zombie movies (technically they were not zombies, but they were) you should enjoy this movie.  Just don't expect any social commentary.

On a seperate note is Timothy Olyphant just a poor man's Bill Paxton?